The descent

    Through the years, it has always been said that Nigeria would experience a great revolution. A revolution where the poor would pick up arms against the elite and the ruling class, a power tussle between the haves and have-nots, a violent rat race. I myself strongly believe in this theory because; the gap between the privileged and less privileged is so wide and deep, you will need a speed boat to wade through those waters. The state lockdown that stemmed from coronavirus ushered in a new wave of agitations that the government obviously did not take into account.

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Are we the problem?

     Good afternoon everyone, ‘Eku corona o’. I pray you’ve all been well and are keeping safe. We can, and will get through this only by sticking with each other and practicing social distancing (i understand how much of a juxtaposition this is), but you get my drift. Now that we’re all gradually been forced to sit at home, I’ve been pondering on something, and I thought I’d share. By a show of hands (or not), who remembers 5-7 years ago when the biggest problem on the world’s plate was Global warming? 
 
It was all every country could talk about, and even we here in Nigeria were not exempted from that conversation. One of the root causes of Global warming was identified as over population, others include the likes of pollution e.t.c. The earth’s resources were being depleted at an alarming rate, coast lines were receding and climate conditions became largely unpredictable. America (with the help of NASA) and a couple of other countries, took it upon themselves to explore other avenues aimed at population control i.e. NASA’s space flights and checks to see if other planets were inhabitable, and if mars had breathable air that could sustain life bla bla bla. 

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Ona Kan O Woja.

For Deenma,
“Ona kan o woja” is a Yoruba phrase that literally means ‘one way doesn’t enter the market’.  When you break it down and redefine it, it simply means: there are numerous ways into the market- not just one. Life has never been a one way thing or a one size fits all thing. If one route doesn’t work, explore another. At any given time, there are always like 3 different ways by which you can achieve something. I really hate one trick pony’s or people that have a set mentality i.e. it’s supposed to be done this way. Okay, but why can’t it go this way? If you’re not certain that success cannot be achieved that way, I strongly feel considering that route should be an option. 

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The man in the mirror

      Never tie your happiness to anything. The dictionary defines fulfillment as the achievement of something desired or promised, or the meeting of a condition or requirement. Going by this definition, we can all deduce that it’s a temporary emotion. Obviously, fulfillment is not a constant. Upon attaining a set goal: you are most likely going to lose steam as you already feel fulfilled in the fact that you achieved that goal. So it would be silly to tie your ‘long-lasting’ happiness to something, or say ‘my happiness is defined by x and y. I made that mistake once Read here.

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TAKING RESPONSIBILITY

       Get off your high horse and realize you’ve been just as bad a friend to other people as they’ve been to you. More often than not, we tend to see the fault in others and put the blame on them when in reality; we’re just as bad as they are. Your friend’s don’t check up on you, when last did you check up on them? They don’t support your business? When was the last time you supported their business endeavors? The smallest things go a long way, so you have no idea how big your small gesture would look in the eye of someone who really needs it. A retweet here and there literally never hurt anybody. To a lot of small business owners and other people just starting up, 1 retweet can go a long way in improving business or boosting someone’s morale.  

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LAGOS NA WA

        The Nigerian government has been making a lot of questionable decisions lately. First off, there was the decision to allow Chinese people that went for the Chinese New Year back into the country following the threat of Corona virus. Wouldn’t it have been more sensible to just suspend flights to and from china? The WHO last week certified it a global threat, and taking into consideration the amount of Chinese people in Nigeria, I would say we’re at risk. The Chinese new year obviously didn’t usher in good tidings: because just weeks after the Corona outbreak, Lassa fever outbreak was recorded in yet another province. Last last, they go dey alright.

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All is Vanity

      This life is nothing but vanity. Anyone that knows me knows that I’m not one to jump on trends or jump on hype. But for the past couple of days, I’ve been seeing this name definition thing online and wondering what it’s all about. It’s simple, how it works is: you type your name into an app, and the app would define you.  The anxiety to find out what it would say about me was quickly building and I needed to find out. I was intrigued about it, it was everywhere: Instagram, WhatsApp, and other Social networking sites. 

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Baby daddy issues

I’ve been wondering, does the system of law still work in Nigeria? Since we’re on the issue of marriage, relationships, and baby mamas- I felt it would be nice to share this one and hear your thoughts. Asides men like Adam who take it upon themselves to do their due diligence by catering for their children Read here, does court-mandated spousal or child support actually work in Nigeria?

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BABY MAMA WAHALA

Before you start thinking this is about me, NO! It’s not. Let me use this opportunity to publicly announce that I Soroye, do not have a baby mama and after going through this traumatizing experience with a friend: I don’t intend on getting one anytime soon. For anonymity and conversation sake, I will refer to my friend as ‘ADAM’ and his baby mama as ‘JEZE’. Please feel free to think of ‘JEZE’ as a short form of Jezebel. Just Incase you were wondering, Adam already knows his business is out in public, so he has no issues with this write-up.

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Wake me up at the good part

       Have you ever thought of running away? Just waking up one morning: packing your bags and leaving. Leaving your reality, leaving your problems and all your insecurities behind? They say part of life is facing ‘life’ head on, but can we skip some and get to the good parts? Sometimes I wish that mind eraser thing from the movie ‘men in black’ was real: just touch my head and make me forget. Different people going through different things, and you can’t help but wonder why we all cannot simply be absolutely-positively happy. 
It makes me remember those dystopian futuristic movies where to be happy, you have to forgo something in your life. I’ll happily let go of some things to skip to the good parts. No matter what level of life you’re in or how seemingly settled you might appear to be, everyone is going through something. No one is conflict free, or immune to the ups and downs of life. I hate to sound like a philosopher or know it all, but I think you have to take everything together. It’s all rolled up into one. The good has to exist with the bad, light with the dark, happiness with sadness, life and death. 
The duality of life, totally captured by the  Chinese in the ying yang. One can’t exist without the other, but even with my ying yang tattoo and my understanding of this philosophy, my mind cant help but wonder. It’s tiring when you have to repeatedly be happy for everyone else: so they don’t tag you as their spiritual enemy, when in actuality you just couldn’t care about the whole facade. All I want to do is wear white and walk around aimlessly, feeling and caressing the leaves while surrounded by beautiful vegetation. (You know the way they do in movie scenes that depict heaven), is that too much to ask for? 
 Every ones idea of heaven’s dress code is a white linen shirt, white linen pants and white espadrilles or Tom’s- depending on how fashionable you were when you were alive. Life can be overwhelming, but while you wait for better days: listen to some soothing music, keep your fingers crossed and ride the wave. Peace and love.